Becoming a father later in life is becoming more and more common. Many celebrity fathers feature in the news, and as second and sometimes third marriages are not uncommon, starting a new family later in life is becoming more accepted.
There are many advantages to becoming a father later in life.
- More time. Older fathers often value the time they have to spend with their young family. Often the first time they had children there were many pressures that distracted them away from what was really important. They had to concentrate on building a career, learn about supporting a young family, work on developing their relationship with a young wife, cope with all the many life worries. Often the children were not able to be as high on the list as they are this time around.
- More money. Financial worries are often no longer a concern for an older father. Their business or career is long established, debt is more likely to be a thing of the past and there is often more disposable income to spend on the things that matter without the requirement to work long hours to keep ones head above water. This sense of security means that a child can have all that it needs without any of the financial worries often associated with younger parents.
- More settled. Some men have to move regularly as their career takes off because they are required to follow the work. Or they may find themselves in a vulnerable place businesswise from time to time. As they progress up the success ladder that situation often alleviates. As they become more settled in their career or business they are able to make clear choices to have an additional and wanted child.
- More patience. Because a lot of the early stresses and worries are behind him now an older father has the time and the temperament to be more patient. He will often have had many life experiences and has learned how to cope with stress and pressure and so can prioritise the important things in life. He can shrug off or laugh about and discard the things that would have bothered him when he was younger and more stressed.
- More experience. Because of his life experiences an older father is in a good position to assess what really matters. He can decide which things need to be addressed and which can be let go. In matters of discipline he can be more pragmatic and see which behaviour needs to be nipped in the bud and which is youthful harmless mischief. He is able to take a more relaxed overview of what is going on.
- More appreciation. Many fathers look back on their earlier family life and regret the mistakes that they made, the time that they missed when their children were young. They often vow never to repeat those earlier mistakes again and really enjoy and appreciate the opportunity to spend time with a new family. This time they can decide to really commit to enjoying their young family.
- Good health. Quality diet, a good exercise regime and good health care all ensure that older people have the opportunity to take good care of themselves, live longer and be fit and healthy into the bargain. Having a young family motivates many older fathers to take good care of themselves so that they can be fit and energetic for as long as possible.
Susan Leigh, Counsellor and Hypnotherapist
www.lifestyletherapy.net