Failure can seem to be a negative word, but it is atually a powerful teacher in our lives. If we succeed at everything we do, if we never experience rejection or disappointment it may feel rather good, but the reality is that we will not have had the same varied opportunities or learning experiences that other people have had.
Think of the high jumper. The only time a high jumper knows that he has achieved his maximum potential is when he repeatedly tries and fails to clear the bar. If he clears it, he will raise the bar and set himself the next goal to work towards because he will determine to achieve even more.
Many of us admit that our difficult clients, projects, relationships are the ones that we learn the most from. They challenge us and we have to work hard and tap into all our inner resources to achieve a good result. They are the lessons that we remember, the ones that we gain the most satisfaction from.
Failure reminds us not to get too cocky or self satisfied. It teaches us to be a little more modest about our accomplishments. It reminds us of the importance of continuing to be open and receptive to new lessons, skills and techniques. New innovations and methods are regularly being introduced and updated, and being prepared to listen and learn helps us to improve and make our life more interesting and challenging. It enables us to provide our clients and customers with better levels of care and attention.
When we have had to work hard to succeed we appreciate it more. We appreciate what it means to us and how hard we have had to work to achieve it. We are able to respect others for their hard won triumphs too. We can respect what they have achieved and our levels of understanding and empathy are improved.
However hard we work there is no guarantee that we will succeed. Some people train, study, work really hard and still fail. They put their heart into their work and are devastated if they do not achieve the result that they have committed so much effort to. But even without the desired outcome it has still been an interesting lesson and experience. They have stretched themselves intellectually and moved out of their familiar comfort zone. The effort to achieve has in itself been an important step to take.
Levels of achievement provide a benchmark for success. Some professional associations will only pass a certain number of candidates each year, so that if the standard is really high some excellent people may fail to pass, or another year, if the standard is somewhat lower, less accomplished candidates may get in. In these situations failure to accomplish a goal is not simply about each individual candidate and their ability. It is also about the ability of others and how many have achieved a particular standard of competancy.
Without the chance of failure the result of success would not taste so sweet. When we achieve our desired goals they really mean something because we have invested so much of ourselves into attaining that result. The possibility of failure keeps a check on our vanity, but should not stop us from trying. It is an important part of extending our skills into new areas of excellence.
Susan Leigh, Counsellor and Hypnotherapist
www.lifestyletherapy.net