How are you getting on with your New Year's resolutions? If you decided to make some this year chances are they're a long distant memory by now. Why do you think that is, why do so many fail within the first month? With four months left this year there's still time to re-evaluate and start again.
It's often the case that people set goals and resolutions for half-baked or even unhelpful reasons. They may think they should use New Year as an opportunity to improve; after all, we could plan, work together and motivate each other.
Suggestions for resolutions may come from 'well-meaning' people, suggesting we learn a new skill, make forward-looking plans, set exciting challenges which please/impress/satisfy our family and friends!
Here are four good questions to ask when deciding on the resolutions or changes you're considering, helping you to determine if you're really sufficiently motivated to commit yourself fully.
- Are you doing it for you? The best motivation comes from doing something which enthusesand energizes you, which makes you determined to stay the course. Motivation comes from aiming for something that's important to you.
- Are you prepared to pace yourself? You may want to stop smoking or drinking, be determined to lose weight or change a bad habit. Some people succeed in achieving their goal all in one go, but others need time to cut down, make adjustments and get used to the new regimen. Pace yourself and do it in the best way for you.
- Do you give yourself credit? Each success, each 'no' to a cigarette, drink or cream cake, each visit to the gym or time when you finish work earlier are all successes. Give yourself credit and savour the different mindset you introduced at that time. Enjoy how good that feels.
- How do you treat yourself if you fail? Don't be too hard on yourself if you slip up sometimes. Treat yourself with the same kindness you would another person, and simply re-start. There's no need to wait for New Year or even the next new day. Commit to immediately getting back on track.
It can sometimes be tempting to tell ourselves 'it's not worth it', 'it's too hard', 'I can't do it'. But these four questions can remind us that we're worth it and we still have four months left in which to make 2019 a positive year in which we achieve our goals.
Susan Leigh, Altrincham, Cheshire, South Manchester counsellor, hypnotherapist, relationship counsellor, writer & media contributor offers help with relationship issues, stress management, assertiveness and confidence. She works with individual clients, couples and provides corporate workshops and support.
She's author of 3 books, 'Dealing with Stress, Managing its Impact', '101 Days of Inspiration #tipoftheday' and 'Dealing with Death, Coping with the Pain', all on Amazon & with easy to read sections, tips and ideas to help you feel more positive about your life.
To order a copy or for more information, help and free articles visit http://www.lifestyletherapy.net