Do You Look Forward to Sharing Your Holidays?
Planning ahead for holidays and time away is an exciting few hours that brightens up our everyday lives and yet it can also present significant considerations. Whether we’re looking to book time away with family, friends or our significant other, scheduling a break often requires some serious negotiations. Not just about when will be a convenient time to suit everyone, but also where to go, what activities to include in the plans and how much we’re prepared to invest financially.
How do feel about sightseeing, wandering round buildings and churches. How much time do we want to spend lying on the beach? What about breaks, coffees, lunches, dinner, alcohol intake. Are we happy to wander round eating a sandwich or are we hoping for a more relaxed sit-down meal in a local bistro.
All these are important considerations when we reflect that 35-50% of people in work find themselves with several days of their annual holiday entitlement remaining each year; they’re too busy to book time off, are under pressure from management, have to cope with staff shortages, or can’t afford the time or money to take a break.
A recent report found that during 2023 and 2024 between 35-61% employees didn’t use all their annual leave, with approximately 17% having 5 or more unclaimed days in 2024, and of those that took leave, 54% expected to work during their holiday break.
So, ensuring that any holidays taken are enjoyable, pleasant, and free from unnecessary stress is important. It’s a good move to agree as much as possible in advance.
Before booking;
Sit down together and be open about what you’re looking for from your holiday, how you’d like to spend your time. Do you want to do nothing and simply relax by the pool or on the beach, preferably with a book in one hand and a cocktail in the other? Are you more activity-motivated, looking forward to enjoying water sports, hill walking and physical pursuits? Are you interested in learning a new skill, volunteering, taking a retreat?
Once everyone’s suggestions are out in the open, it’s important to address the serious matter of time, expense and logistics. Some people might be on a tight budget or instead prefer to spend their money taking two or three cheaper trips rather than one expensive break.
Children often are another consideration. Young children might enjoy resort-based activities, like sports clubs and play dates, which are often available to be booked in advance. And teenagers often want to go off, do their own thing and perhaps occasionally agree to meet up at mealtimes. So, a reasonably lively resort with plenty of activities is often the best choice when children need to be accommodated.
Going away with a partner, especially in the early days of a relationship, can present a sizeable learning curve. There’s often an eagerness to get to know each other, a keenness to make memories and share lots together, but equally as individuals there’s also the desire to include our own interests and enjoy ourselves too.
Some couples may want to spend their holidays together but have very different views on how they wish to spend their free time. Could they perhaps agree to take turns in organising alternative breaks, providing an opportunity to learn more about each other’s interests. Or some may choose to book short breaks apart so that they can spend time engaging in their interest, whilst still being available for a shared break together at another time.
Weekend city breaks or a few days in a country house hotel can be a good way to introduce a holiday into a newish relationship, offering time to learn more about each other. It’s a short enough time to stay busy, interested and occupied, but not too long to experience the pressure of having to find ways to fill the time.
Initially, it’s important to remember to be sensitive about personal space, perhaps to accommodate private bathroom time, especially if one has been single for some time. Or allow a little personal, quiet time for reading, relaxing and doing their own thing. There’s no necessity to do everything together and expecting that level of closeness may start to feel a little claustrophobic.
Open and honest communications are important, but so too is being receptive to new ideas and being flexible enough to try new experiences, including those that have not previously been entertained. Even if you find that they’re not especially enjoyable, are definitely not for you and will never be repeated, you can be pleased that you’ve shown willing, had a go and tried something new. And often when things don’t go to plan, retaining a sense of humour can result in long-lasting memories to reminisce about together afterwards.
Holidays are a treasured part of each year, something to enjoy planning and looking forward to, providing time away from the stress and routine of our daily lives. They provide the opportunity to enhance our relationships, to share fun and good times together whilst making precious memories. Careful attention and preparation can ensure a special time is enjoyed by all.
Susan Leigh, Counsellor and Hypnotherapist www.lifestyletherapy.net